#332: Earth vs. the Spider

Release Date: October 31st, 1958

Format: Streaming (Tubi)

Written by: László Görög and George Worthing Yates

Directed by: Bert I. Gordon

2 Stars

Bert I. Gordon, the king of campy sci-fi monster flicks from the ‘50s, was a frequent MST3K punching bag (eight of his films were chosen to torture Joel and his two loyal robot companions, Crow T. Robot and Tom Servo, making him the most featured director in the show’s decades-long history). Mr. Gordon’s hack reputation actually serves his 1958 B-movie, Earth vs. the Spider, quite well. The movie is surprisingly competent, and at times, plain ol’ fun.

I imagine it would have been even more fun back in 1958. Picture this: you’ve just parked your Chrysler sedan at the drive-in on Halloween night, excited to watch Earth vs. the Spider, the poster of which promised a 30-foot tarantula that can’t be stopped by bullets or flames. ‘The spider will eat you alive!’ 

Then the movie starts playing and the acting turns out to be pretty crummy and the sets are cheap. The story is ho hum. You and your friends chuckle at some of the silly props before wandering over to the concession stand for some popcorn and a hotdog. The drive-in’s dirt lot is littered with heavy American cars awash in diffused light and pseudo-science talk of giant arachnids.

When you get back to the car, the giant spider finally appears! It looks pretty good. But wait, where’d it come from. How did it get so big?

Does it matter really? Not at all. We’re just here for some good-natured goofs and monster effects that are light on budget, but heavy on charm.

Yeah, it’s not that great, but if you don’t like Earth vs. the Spider, I’m not sure why you’re at the movies in the first place.